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Self Improvement
Swarnakshi Sharma May 28th, 2022 · 8min read

“I’m Not Good At Anything” | Why You Feel This Way (And How To Cope With It)

Seeing your friends and coworkers getting either married, promoted, or successful in their endeavors can bring forth feelings of pride. Still, at the same time, it can evoke feelings of envy and hopelessness. Especially when you’re not close to achieving your dreams. Witnessing others moving ahead in their success can make you say to yourself, “I’m not good at anything

While it’s common to think about not being good at anything, the more you get stuck on this kind of thinking, the more you begin to lose your self-esteem and self-confidence.

Generally speaking, thinking, “I’m not good at anything” can point to an internal crisis that involves low self-esteem, a lot of self-doubts, and a loss of confidence in your abilities.

Many people can shake such thoughts away but even then the persistent feeling that one is not good at anything or simple not good enough can weigh you down until it becomes difficult to move on.

In this blog, let’s take a look at why you might feel “I’m not good at anything”, what this feeling looks like, the potential causes, and how to move on.

“I’m Not Good At Anything”: What It Looks Like

I’m not good at anything” This statement is an indication that you are low on self-esteem and have a poor sense of self. More often than not, low self-esteem can be a sign of depression and anxiety. Other than that, negative thoughts such as, “I’m not good at anything” can also impact your performance at work, school, and in relationships with others.

Let’s see what this thinking may look like:

1.Comparing Yourself With Others

When you’re wondering if you’re not good at anything, this thought can often be born when you begin comparing yourself to others. Witnessing others’ success on social media, TV, or in magazines can make you feel that while others are successfully moving forward and have found their happiness and purpose in life, you’re stuck where you were two years ago.

2.Focusing On Past Failures

You may also begin a list of why you’re still unsuccessful when others are moving forward. You may begin to think about the time you were rejected for a job you wanted or when you tried to complete a course only to fail.

3.Avoiding New Interests

If you’re thinking about how you’re not good at anything, then you might also feel an inability to pursue any new interests or hobbies. Your negative thinking may be holding you back to enjoy your interests. Even if you gather enough courage to begin, thinking about your past failures may stop you again.

Other than thinking, “I’m not good at anything”, you may have similar thoughts such as:

  • “I don’t have any talents”
  • “No one is interested in me or my achievements”
  • “Why am I trying so hard when I’m going to fail?”
  • “Everyone around me is successful except me”
  • “I’ll never be good enough”

Why You Feel This Way: The Causes

There can be many factors that may cause you to think “I’m not good at anything”. More often, these reasons can manifest because of your personality traits, life experiences, upbringing, or any other major lifestyle change.

Let’s see what are the potential causes of low self-esteem and this negative thinking:

1.Negative Self-Talk

A classic example of negative self-talk is “I’m not good at anything” or “I’m not good enough”. How you talk to yourself can impact your self-esteem, self-identity, and self-confidence. If you keep up with the negative self-talk, then you will inevitably develop low self-esteem and begin to think you’re not good at anything.

2.Toxic Relationships

Another reason why you may be thinking, “I’m not good at anything” can also be because of the company around you. If you’re around toxic people or in toxic relationships, then their closeness can also affect your self-esteem and self-confidence, making you think you’re not good enough.

3.Past Trauma

Childhood experiences and past trauma can also severely affect our self-esteem, confidence, and the way we think. If you’ve had an abusive childhood or any trauma in your life in the past then it could be one of the reasons you’re thinking about how you’re not good at anything.

How To Cope And Move On?

Luckily, there are many ways you can increase your low self-esteem and break the cycle of negative thinking such as, “I’m not good enough” or “I’m not good at anything”. Here are some ways to help you cope and move on:

1.Step Away From Social Media

One of the first things you need to do to stop thinking you’re not good at anything is to step away and take a break from social media. While social media can help you stay connected with others, it can also make you feel negative about yourself, and affect your self-esteem and self-image. What people post on social media is a carefully constructed facade. No one likes to publicly share their failures, remember that.

Stepping away from social media can help you stop comparing yourself to others and encourage you to focus on yourself for a change.

2.Smile And Accept Compliments

When you think “I’m not good at anything” you often don’t believe what others say about you, even if they are compliments. If you have low self-esteem, then you are not very good at accepting compliments. To move on from your negative thinking of you’re not good enough, you need to learn how to smile and accept compliments.

Next time, someone compliments you, just smile and accept it. See the magic happen! At first, you might feel a little uncomfortable but once you continue accepting compliments, you’ll notice a positive change in your thinking and your self-esteem (and self-confidence) will get a boost.

3.Journal Your Way Through It

Another amazing way to overcome negative thinking and low self-esteem is to journal your way through it. Pen down your thoughts (negative and positive) and begin an investigation into what and why you’re feeling what you are. Once you take note of your feelings and emotions, you’ll begin to feel better about yourself.

Just once or twice a day to pen down your feelings and thoughts in a journal is enough. If you notice a pattern of negative thoughts and low self-confidence, then you can switch to gratitude journaling to change your thinking patterns.

4.Say Yes To Therapy

Therapy, whether you believe it or not, is a great way to address negative thoughts and low self-esteem. Therapy can help you understand what is making you feel you’re not good at anything, how that thinking is affecting your life, and how you can cope and manage such thoughts.

Therapy approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) can be a good choice to address negative thinking patterns and learn new skills to combat such thinking.

5.At Last, Look Within

Another powerful way to cope with the thought, “I’m not good at anything” is to look within. What is your idea of “something good”? Is it the idea of getting married or promoted? Or something else? What gave life to such thoughts? While getting married or promoted may be external achievements, you need to remember that they are not the only thing.

Sometimes, what makes us “good enough” is not external or obvious. Being a good friend, a good spouse, or a good parent can be enough. Even if you’ve lived through a challenge and have come out as a winner and someone stronger than before, that can be good enough too. Look within to see what makes you good enough.

A Word From The Writer

Thinking, “I’m not good at anything” is a common yet powerful statement and if you continue saying this to yourself, one day you may even begin to believe it. While this is just a simple statement, it can have a significant impact on your thinking, your self-esteem, your confidence, and how you view yourself.

We all have something we’re good at. Trust me, getting up in the morning and making your bed can be a great accomplishment to be proud of. Look within and see what makes you good enough because believe it or not, you have something to be proud of and that makes you good at anything (and everything).

You just have to search for it!

Always remember, you are good at being just you!

I hope this blog helped you. For more, you can write to us at info@calmsage.com or DM us on social media. You can also share your thoughts on this article in the comments section below!

Take care and be proud of who you are!

Because you’re the best when you’re you!

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