Effective Ways To Deal With Relationship Ambivalence

Last Update on January 27, 2023 : Published on January 29, 2023
Effective Ways To Deal With Relationship Ambivalence

We have all been in relationships, romantic or not, sometimes relationships become ambivalent. We fail to understand where that relationship is going. To want to be with the person but there is this unrest in the relationship which makes you feel like parting ways.

Relationship ambivalence is usually seen in romantic relationships; however, ambivalence can occur in any kind of relationship like friendship, parent-child, student-teacher, colleagues, etc. It’s important to step out of relationships that have become toxic even when it’s one of the most difficult things to do.

According to recent surveys, it was found that relationship ambivalence is a very common cause of stress and emotional turmoil in people. If you think you are experiencing uncertainty or ambivalence in your relationship, it’s important you address the issue.

Today we’re going to explore different ways to overcome relationship ambivalence so that you can avoid unnecessary stress and emotional damage. But first, let’s understand what relationship ambivalence is…

What Is Relationship Ambivalence?

Relationship-Ambivalence

Relationship ambivalence is a very common phenomenon that many of us face time and again in our relationships. Sometimes it resolves easily but sometimes it can take a toll on your mental health. Not everyone realizes that the feeling of being “stuck” in a relationship is hurting your emotional and mental health.

Relationship ambivalence is when your relationship becomes directionless. When it’s good, it is so good but when it’s bad, it becomes a complete mess. You feel very uncertain about the relationship. There are days you want to never see your partner again but somehow you just can’t do it.

It feels like you’re stuck with them. You can’t live with them; you can’t live without them. The most frustrating thing about such relationships is that it’s a lose-lose situation. No matter what you choose to do, you’re going to get hurt. Therefore, it’s important to make the right choice because in any way you will have to go through a painful journey.

What Causes Ambivalence In A Relationship?

A Relationship

When we get into a relationship, there are a lot of things that we expect out of that relationship. Sometimes you don’t get what you expect out of your partner but you’re so invested in the relationship that parting ways doesn’t seem like an option.

According to the Social Exchange Theory given by George Homans, every partnership is based on a give-and-take relationship. When you invest in something you’re always looking for a response that benefits you.

We assess the gains and losses before engaging in anything and when in a relationship you don’t receive the gain you expected, ambivalence can occur. Relationship ambivalence is a result of your expectations not being met.

You feel stuck because the things you expect of your partner are missing but on the other hand, you love your partner so much that stepping out of your relationship feels impossible. It is a battle between your feelings and your expectations.

How To Overcome Relationship Ambivalence?

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Many people live with relationship ambivalence for years and the unrest can be reflected in their relationship. Relationship ambivalence is not something that needs intense interventions, all you need is to clear your mind and have an honest conversation with your partner.

However, it is difficult to approach the situation directly, therefore here are some effective ways to deal with relationship ambivalence. Let’s have a look at them;

1. Know what you want: let go of what ‘should’ be done. Close your eyes and think about what you want. Do you want to let go of your expectations or your partner? Both are important, just give them a good thought.

2. Know the direction of your anxiety: relationship ambivalence can foster anxiety and it’s important to know where your anxiety is coming from. Is it the thought of being away from your partner or is it not receiving the same amount that you invested in the relationship?

3. Do not assume or think for your partner: it’s important to know and understand your partner’s point of view and not simply assume things. Always let your partner speak their heart and try to understand where they are coming from.

4. Let your partner be a part of your life and not your whole life: it’s important to have other people in your life, do not obsess over your partner. Let them be an important part of your life but do not make your life only about them.

5. Have honest conversations: it’s important to tell your partner exactly how you feel. Sometimes your partner’s behavior can be unintentional therefore both partners must have honest and open communication between them.

6. Evaluate your relationship together: one of the most important things to do when stuck in a relationship ambivalence is to evaluate your relationship together. Talk about how toxic or not your relationship has become, and make a mutual decision that benefits both of you.

That’s All Folks!

I hope you found this blog about relationship ambivalence and how to deal with relationship ambivalence helpful, informative, and interesting.

Do share this blog with your friends and family so that we can all understand ambivalence in our relationships and how to overcome relationship ambivalence.

Thanks for reading.

Take care and stay safe.

About The Author

Kirti Bhati
Kirti Bhati

I am an English literature (major) and psychology (minor) graduate from St. Bede’s College, Shimla. Postgraduate in Clinical psychology from IIS University, Jaipur. She has published a Research paper on Music therapy in the military population and Workplace stress in a national seminar conducted by Fortis hospital (gurugram) and international seminar conducted by St. Bede’s College, Shimla, Respectively. Authored a dissertation work on ‘effect of social media addiction on the mental and physical well-being in adolescents’ Currently working at calm sage as a writer.

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