10 Traits to Help You Spot a Shallow Person from a Mile Away

In our lives, we meet many people – some are worth keeping in our lives and others are best to let go. Some of these people we meet on our journey will be the ones who will stick with us to the end of time, and other times we’ll experience encounters that are best forgotten and never worth remembering. In my life, I’ve met both types of people, but my encounters with shallow people left me reeling.

Shallow-minded people or shallow people are those, who no matter how hard you try, would remain disinterested and inauthentic. These people will pop up beside you when your life’s going well, but the moment you find yourself in a tough spot, they’ll vanish as if never existed.

You can identify a shallow person as someone with whom you can’t have a single serious and meaningful conversation and someone who just lacks basic emotional and intellectual understanding. Because of this, shallow people are often categorized as petty and unimaginative. These people are also the ones who can’t have a meaningful relationship with anyone as they lack the depth that is needed in any relationship.

If you suspect yourself surrounded by a shallow person, here are some common traits that you can watch out for. Keep reading to learn how to deal with a shallow person at the end of this blog.

Traits of a Shallow Person to Watch Out

Meaningful social connections are important for our social growth. We need friendships and support as well as someone to have thoughtful conversations with to keep our minds stimulated. If a relationship doesn’t have meaning or lacks depth, then it can affect our growth and personality development.

Conversations are just one aspect; however, other things can also support our social understanding and growth such as curiosity for life, values we put on our qualities, emotional or intellectual depth, and more.

Shallow people lack all these qualities. So, if you suspect that you’re surrounded by shallow people, here are the traits you need to watch out for;

1. They Value Appearances More

The first trait that can help you spot a shallow person is their appreciation of physical appearance and surface things more than what’s inside. If a person judges you based on your physical attributes and surface-level appearance, then they can be considered a shallow person.

Our appearance is just one aspect of our personality and yet if someone judges you based on that, they hardly care about your intellect and other important qualities.

2. They Can’t Have Deep Conversations

When you meet someone, it’s normal to start a conversation with them, right? More often than not, the conversation we hold with others holds some value, but when the conversations lack any kind of depth and meaning, then assume you’re dealing with a shallow person.

Any conversation with a shallow person becomes boring and frustrating after a while. If that’s the case, then it’s time to reconsider the relationship you have with this person.

3. They Crave Attention

Who doesn’t like attention? However, a shallow person is someone who craves attention, gossip, and drama. These are the things that excite a shallow person.

More often than not, they love talking about themselves, and other times, they love exaggerating gossip to create unnecessary drama. If there is someone in your life who does this regularly; makes a simple situation complicated just for the sake of drama; then you can consider them a shallow person.

4. They Lack Emotional Depth

Emotions and feelings help us judge the true depth of a person. If there’s someone in your life who is just unable to respond to emotions appropriately in any situation or struggles to form emotional depth, then they might be considered a shallow person too. In a situation, where you need support, a shallow person would be the one to say, “Just cheer up!”

5. They Are Materialistic

We like having possessions and materialistic things that we have formed attachments with, but when someone begins to measure worth in possessions or materialistic things, then it can be another trait of a shallow person. You’ll know when you’re dealing with a shallow person when they focus on material things and possessions more than your personality or state of mind.

6. They Are Hardly True To Themselves

Who doesn’t struggle to find their true identity, right? I know I have and still do, but that doesn’t mean that I keep pretending to be someone I’m not. A shallow person does the opposite of this. They don’t care about who they are, truly, as long as they feel accepted or belonged.

They don’t care about their true selves as long as they get what they want by following others around. If you find someone putting a mask on every time, they need something, know that you’re dealing with a shallow person.

7. They Care Too Much About Being “Trendy”

Another trait of shallow people is that they care more about being “cool” and “trendy” than being themselves. No matter what it costs them, they’ll do things as long as they keep “trending”.

Being shallow means that a person’s lifestyle keeps changing and they keep up appearances by buying the latest fashions, gadgets, and material things that can allow them to keep up with the trends. A shallow person does not care about quality and contentment.

8. They Are Show-Offs

This brings me to the next point. Another trait of shallow people that can be related to the above-listed trait is that a shallow person is a show-off, through and through. Their social media profile shows the best highlights of their lives and is framed in a way that shows that they are living their best life.

They want others to appreciate them and say what an amazing life they have. They keep showing off to gain attention and hardly care about being down-to-earth.

9. They Are Self-Centered

Another trait that can help you spot a shallow person is that they are too self-centered and don’t care about a give-and-take relationship. To them, it’s their needs that take precedence over anyone else’s.

If you’re in a shallow relationship, then your partner would be the one who would ignore your needs to focus on their needs more. If you’re in a shallow friendship, then a friend would be more concerned about their social status than what you’re going through.

10. They Are Not Good Listeners

Lastly, a trait to help spot a shallow person can be their lack of healthy listening skills. Shallow people are not good listeners and this has nothing to do with being socially awkward or anxious. Shallow people often don’t care about what you’re saying and only show interest in things they care about.

If you’re talking about something that holds no interest to them, they’re likely to respond offhandedly. They won’t ask follow-up questions or give any listening cues and would do everything in their power to bring the conversation to their point of interest.

How to Deal With a Shallow Person?

Now that you know what to look out for, you need to know how to deal with a shallow person as well. A shallow person isn’t a bad person just a little distracted one, so you need to accept their personality as it is. Avoid criticizing them as there is a high chance that they might not even be aware of their own superficial traits. Just because they are shallow-minded does not mean that they are toxic or bad.

Another thing you need to keep in mind when dealing with a shallow person is to know that you’re in charge to decide how long you want the interaction with them to last. It’s up to you to keep your distance. If you can’t avoid interacting with them, then maybe try to shift the conversation to a subject that would diffuse their shallow-minded behaviors.

Most of all, you need to understand that you’re in power and you can excuse yourself from their company. If you feel that this shallow person is taking too much of your time and draining your energy, then politely excuse yourself and walk away.

Writer’s Words…

It’s challenging to form deeper and more meaningful relationships with a shallow person, but one needs to remember that just because a person is shallow does not mean they are bad. If they are willing to listen, you can always respond to them with kindness and compassion and help them shift their perspective, and teach them how to be more broad-minded.

Instead of criticizing them for their ways, allow them to be themselves and help them to make changes that will help them become a better version of themselves.

Can you spot a shallow person now? Did these traits of a shallow person help you spot one? Let me know about it in the comments below. You can also share your thoughts with me by leaving a message on Calm Sage’s official social media account.

Take Care!