‘I Need To Talk To Someone About My Problems’ | Who Can You Trust? Why Talk? How To Talk?
“The best way out is always through.” — Robert Frost
Living with a mental health disorder can be weary if I’m honest. Getting up from bed can seem like a huge task and if you’re waking up every morning, then you’re stronger than you think. In any case, coping with poor mental health can be a war, one that can make us feel trapped.
Well, no one said that winning a war is easy.
In our case, winning can be even more challenging when no one understands the basics of the war we’re fighting every moment. But, did you consider the fact that maybe we’re not sharing our struggles with the right people?
We don’t realize this but so many people are going through the same thing we are. They are having similar experiences and are coming out the other side, stronger and better. And if they can do it, why not us?
Why not talk to them when you need to talk to someone about your problems?
If you’re wondering, ‘I need to talk to someone about my problems’ then you’re on the right track. Without knowing, you’ve won the first round!
You’ve realized that bottling emotions is not the solution and admitting that you need to talk to someone (whether a professional or a friend) is a HUGE step. And admitting you have a problem is even a bigger step. This admission needs courage and my friend, you have it in spades!
Now that you’ve decided you need to talk to someone about your problems, let’s see whom you can trust, why talking is the right step, and how to begin the conversation.
Who Can You Trust?
‘Whom should I talk to?’ Well, there are people with whom you can share your problems with and they’ll listen to you without judgment. People you should trust can include:
1. Your Friend
Sometimes we need to talk it out, express our feelings, and put our emotions into words. Who else will understand if not your friend, one who’s seen your ups and downs and has stood string besides you through it all? Friends can help put things into perspective, give context to a situation, and improve our mood.
Talking to a close and trusted friend can help you stop the spiral of negative thinking and bring you back to the present.
2. Your Partner/Spouse
If you’re having relationship issues and if you’re seeing changes in your partner that are making your mental health go downhill, then you can benefit from talking to your partner/spouse. You can put off the things causing you distress but in the end, they’ll eventually burst and will make things worse.
Sharing the source of your problems with your partner can help you! If you feel like talking to a couple’s therapist will help, go for it!
3. A Therapist
Whether it’s your mental health or a relationship thing, you can always trust a therapist to help you solve it. Even if you’re only looking for simple guidance, talking to a professional can help. A therapist is trained to understand and solve the problem from the roots. Therapy also offers a safe, non-judgmental space to be yourself.
You can freely express what you’re feeling, what you’re thinking, and what is bothering you. Therapy helps you come up with effective coping strategies to help you improve your overall health too.
4. Volunteers for Community Counselors
You might feel, at times, that you have no one to talk to about your problems but there’s always someone out there who is ready to help you and listen to you without asking anything in return. During tough times, when it becomes difficult to share your problems with your friends, family, or partner, you can seek help from volunteers or community counselors (online or by visiting your nearest community center).
7 Cups, Talkwithstranger, eTherapy Pro are just some examples of free online counseling. You can connect with mental health support groups on Facebook or Reddit. Online support from people who are and have been through what you’re experiencing can help a lot.
Why Should You Talk About Your Problems?
Talking about mental health problems can be very challenging and you need a lot of courage to open up about your problems with someone. And if you’ve decided to talk, then kudos to you!
But why talk to someone about your problems? Here are some reasons why you should talk:
1. Gives A Perspective
It’s easy to spiral downward in the well of negative thinking and if you tend to think a lot about the worst-case scenarios, then you can benefit from talking your problems out. Talking will give you a different perspective and help you see a different side of things – may be the more positive side.
2. Helps Understand Emotions
When we’re caught in our emotions, our brains tend to go into overdrive. In such cases, our stress response may get activated which can make our situation worse. Talking can help label your emotions which, in turn, can help decrease your distress. When you put names on your emotions, they become easier to control.
3. Get Advice
Sometimes all we need is a solution and sometimes talking about our problems can help you get advice on how to find the solution. If you’re stuck on a problem, then talking about it with a therapist can help you find effective solutions and get helpful advice.
How To Start The Conversation?
You’ve decided to start the conversation but how to begin? Here are some tips to help you begin:
1. Pick The Right Person
Did you open up about your problems in the past but after the talk felt even worse? Well, there’s a chance you chose the wrong person. People are entitled to their opinions but some people’s opinions can hurt us, even if their heart was in the right place. And some people just can’t seem to say the right thing.
It’s OK, though. All you need to do is find a friend who will listen to your problems, one who doesn’t make you feel overwhelmed or drain your energy in return. Try and find someone who’s been through a similar experience as you. This way, you’ll find different solutions to your problem too.
2. Time And Place Matters
Everything has a time and place. Especially when you want to share your vulnerabilities and weaknesses. You need to find a place where you can be comfortable and feel safe. You need to pick a time when you will have the least distractions.
Try to avoid crowded places or where you might have some eavesdroppers lurking. It’s also important to ask the person you’re talking to if they are in the right frame of mind to talk and listen to you. You both will be emotionally invested in the conversation so be prepared.
3. Acknowledge Your Problems
Life has ups and downs and where there is pain, there is joy. That’s what you need to keep in mind when you need to talk to someone about your problems. Acknowledge your problems because when you accept your problems, only then you’ll be able to embrace the solutions.
Remember, life is supposed to be about ups and downs but you letting those moments of pain override the moments of joy is not what life is about.
4. Seek Professional Help
Therapists and counselors are trained to help you find effective solutions to your problems – whether they are big or small. If you’re considering talking about your problems with a friend or your partner but don’t know how to begin the conversation, you can seek help from a therapist.
And if you’re looking for someone with whom you can share or talk about your problems, a therapist is always a good choice!
You can reach out to BetterHelp by signing up below! BetterHelp offers affordable and trained therapists that are always there to help you out, regardless of your problems.
You can always reach out to us at firstname.lastname@example.org or DM us on social media if you want to talk about your problems for free! I hope now you know what to do when you think, ‘I need to talk to someone about my problems’. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!
We’re always here to listen to you and help you!
You are not alone! Keep fighting!