10 Signs You’re in a Narcissistic Marriage or Relationship

Last Update on September 1, 2022 : Published on September 1, 2022

Do you know what narcissism is? Narcissism is a personality trait that makes a person too self-centered. They are people who are full of grandiosity, demand attention all the time, and completely lack empathy.

When you first meet a narcissist, they come across as a confident and sorted person but if you spend more time with them, you can really see the toxic energy in them. They are so full of themselves and they really don’t care about anyone.

Narcissists are so selfish and self-centered that having a good meaningful relationship with someone is next to impossible. This doesn’t mean they don’t get into relationships, they do but they expect their partner to fulfill their need for attention and grandiosity.

It basically becomes very difficult for the partner to be in a relationship with a narcissist. If you are someone who is having trouble in their relationship or marriage or have doubts about your partner being a narcissist, you should know about the narcissistic relationship pattern.

That’s what we are going to do today, here are some signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship or marriage you need to watch out for;

Signs Of A Narcissistic Relationship


1.You feel a disconnect between the two of you

If you are in a narcissistic marriage or relationship your narcissistic partner is most likely to have a conversation with you when they want to, make plans without considering your opinions, they only brag about their life without mentioning you even once when they talk about their life.  Such behavior can make you feel like you’re not really connected with your partner.

2.You feel like you’re being manipulated

Manipulating people into doing things for them is a very basic trait of a narcissist. Your narcissist partner might not exactly tell you what they want from you but they might slide in some subtle threats which might give you a hint of what is being expected out of you. They somehow make you believe that if you don’t do what they ask you to, it will have negative consequences.

3.You feel like you’re not good enough

Again a signature trait of a narcissist is to make others feel like they aren’t enough. If you are someone whose partner is constantly putting you down and making you feel like you are not good enough, that’s probably a sign you’re in a narcissistic relationship or marriage.

4.You feel like you’re being gaslighted

If your partner simply disapproves of whatever you say or denies the facts you believe are true, it means they are gaslighting you. Your narcissist partner might do this just so that they get a sense of control and power over you.


5.You feel like all your conversations turn into arguments

When you live with a narcissistic partner, it’s very common to feel like every conversation you try to have with them instantly turns into an argument before you even know it. A narcissist tends to get on your nerve to get some reaction and can then hold that against you.

6.You feel like it’s always your fault

A narcissist believes that they are never wrong and always makes their partner feel like it’s their fault. They do it so smoothly that you start contemplating your words and actions, they fill you with guilt and shame.

7.You feel like you always have to be cautious

This feeling is very common among people who are married to a narcissist or are in a relationship with one. If you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, your narcissistic partner can explode into a raging animal, you’re clearly experiencing a case of narcissistic rage. Even simple & stupid things will make them angry and of course, it will always be your fault.

8.You feel like you’re constantly criticized

A narcissistic partner is never content with how their partner is. They believe that they are perfect and so should be their partner. If your partner is constantly criticizing the way you talk, what you eat, how you look, what you do, etc., I’m afraid you’re in a narcissistic relationship or marriage.

9.You feel like your needs always take a back seat

It is very typical of a narcissist to put their needs above anyone else. If you are in a narcissistic marriage or relationship there is a high chance your partner will only think of their needs and will never pay attention to your needs and demands.

10.You get a silent treatment

When a narcissist is annoyed with someone or if their partner has not behaved in the way they expect them to, you tend to give the silent treatment. It’s like their first weapon of manipulation. They will give you a silent treatment so that you feel like you’ve hurt them, it’s all your fault and how bad of a person you are.

How To Deal With A Narcissist Husband/Wife?

Having a narcissist husband or wife will put a lot of load on your relationship and might even turn toxic if you are not able to deal with a narcissist husband/wife. Once you have ticked all the signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship or marriage, you should learn how to deal with them and you should also know when to end the relationship.

If you feel like your narcissistic partner is weighing you down mentally and physically and no matter what you do to save the relationship you come back to square one, know that it’s time to end the relationship.

However if you feel like there is some scope and you can still save your relationship, here are a few things you can do to deal with a narcissistic husband/wife;

  • Create some boundaries
  • Be clear and assertive about what you expect out of them
  • Have patience because they will throw tantrums
  • Learn to take a step back if they overwhelm you
  • Know that their action and behavior is not caused by you
  • You will have to make some sacrifices so be prepared
  • Identify gaslighting and don’t give into that
  • Don’t internalize blame

That’s All Folks!

I hope you found this blog about signs you’re in a narcissistic relationship or marriage helpful and thought-provoking. If you are dealing with a narcissistic husband/wife you should do things that protect your mental wellbeing and if need be know when to end the relationship.

Thanks for reading.

Take care and stay safe.

About The Author

Kirti Bhati
Kirti Bhati

I am an English literature (major) and psychology (minor) graduate from St. Bede’s College, Shimla. Postgraduate in Clinical psychology from IIS University, Jaipur. She has published a Research paper on Music therapy in the military population and Workplace stress in a national seminar conducted by Fortis hospital (gurugram) and international seminar conducted by St. Bede’s College, Shimla, Respectively. Authored a dissertation work on ‘effect of social media addiction on the mental and physical well-being in adolescents’ Currently working at calm sage as a writer.

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