All About Relational Intelligence! Why Does It Matter?

Last Update on February 7, 2023 : Published on February 7, 2023
All About Relational Intelligence

Have you ever noticed some people have a way of dealing with people and managing their relationships explicitly? Well, some people are highly relational people which means they understand relationships more than others.

Just like emotional intelligence, relational intelligence is a thing! People high in relational intelligence have a strong sense of relationships and connecting with other people. They know how to handle disagreements very smoothly.

Relationships are tough and striking a balance doesn’t come easy. With relational intelligence, you have the ability to understand other people and what they are expecting out of this relationship. They have the right amount of empathy in them.

Want to know more about relational intelligence?

Let’s get started…

What Do You Mean By Relational Intelligence?

Relational intelligence was introduced by Esther Perel, an author, and a psychotherapist. Esther talks about the complex systems of relationships in her best-selling book. I assume she has high relational intelligence because she has understood relationships and life so well and it is all reflected in her book.

According to Esther, the quality of your relationships reflects directly on the quality of your life. Relational intelligence is one’s ability to manage relationships very well. Emotional intelligence has a huge role to play here too.

Emotional intelligence helps you step into other people’s shoes and really feel their struggle and relational intelligence helps you act in the best way possible to manage that struggle in that relationship.

People with high relational intelligence can manage disagreements so well, they use empathy and compassion while dealing with difficult situations in a relationship. Therefore, relational intelligence works best in a work environment.

Why Does Relational Intelligence Matter?

Relational Intelligence

Relationships can be tough to handle no matter in what capacity you two are related. No matter what kind of relationship (platonic or romantic) you share, with relational intelligence you can understand the meaning of each relationship in your life.

Relational intelligence not only makes you good at managing relationships but allows you to evaluate the relationships you share with others and how each of them is impacting your life. High relational intelligence helps you prioritize your relationships.

When you use your relational intelligence to examine each of your relationships, you are able to put them all in a hierarchy. You have a clear idea of all the relationships that helps you grow, the ones you need to keep close.

Relational intelligence also increases your ability to form effective and functional boundaries. You have this ability to know when, where, and how much energy you need to spend on various relationships. As Esther claimed, the quality of relationships reflects your quality of life, relational intelligence helps you keep growth-promoting relationships close.

How To Build High Relational Intelligence?

High Relational Intelligence

Fortunately high relational intelligence is something you can work upon. If you think you’ll be finding it really hard to manage your relationships and prioritize them, you may have low relational intelligence.

However, even if you aren’t having any problems with your relationships, building relational intelligence will only help you in the future. Now there are no underlined techniques to build relational intelligence however you can do a few things to be better at understanding your relationships;

  • Be mindfully present in your relationships.No matter what kind of relationship you’re in, make sure you are completely invested in it.
  • Know where your relationship is headed.It’s important to know why you are in that relationship and what it brings to your life. Don’t maintain a relationship if it means nothing to you.
  • Be honest about your feelings. It’s important that your relationship is built on honesty. Now it can be difficult but try not to lead someone on if you are not completely invested in it.
  • Be open about your priorities. You should know which of your relationships are more important to you. It is also important for others to know where their relationship stands for you.
  • Don’t be a people pleaser. It will only hurt you and people related to you if you focus on pleasing people rather than telling them the truth.
  • Be compassionate about your relationships and try to build trust. If there is no trust in the relationship, the purpose of having that relationship becomes blurry.
  • Create a healthy and growth-promoting environmentaround you. If you need your relationships to flourish, you need a nurturing environment. Make sure you give love, acceptance, and appreciation to your relationships.

That’s All Folks!

I hope you found this blog about relational intelligence helpful, informative, and interesting. If you think managing relationships is just not your cup of tea, maybe you need to work on your relational intelligence. Do share this blog with your friends and family.

Thanks for reading.

Take care and stay safe.

About The Author

Kirti Bhati
Kirti Bhati

I am an English literature (major) and psychology (minor) graduate from St. Bede’s College, Shimla. Postgraduate in Clinical psychology from IIS University, Jaipur. She has published a Research paper on Music therapy in the military population and Workplace stress in a national seminar conducted by Fortis hospital (gurugram) and international seminar conducted by St. Bede’s College, Shimla, Respectively. Authored a dissertation work on ‘effect of social media addiction on the mental and physical well-being in adolescents’ Currently working at calm sage as a writer.

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