Are You Experiencing Relationship Burnout? Check Out The Signs!
When your relationship is new, everything looks rosy and everything feels exciting, if not intense. There’s no lack of love and affection when the relationship is new. But, as time goes on, the energy between you and your partner may start to sizzle out, leaving in its wake nothing but fatigue – or as you can call it, Relationship Burnout.
We can define relationship burnout as the feeling of disconnect and detachment from your partner, for whatever reason. With time, you may either subconsciously or consciously put a distance between your partner and yourself. This can be because you feel apathy, negativity, or even stuck in a rut in the relationship.
Relationship burnout can leave you feeling detached and your relationship worse for wear. Let’s take a look at what relationship burnout is, its causes, signs, and what you can do next.
What Is Relationship Burnout?
Similar to any other burnout, relationship burnout can arise when your stress becomes too much and you begin to feel the signs of exhaustion creeping in. When you don’t feel support from your partner or when you feel undervalued in the relationship, the chances of catching relationship burnout get higher.
If you’re experiencing relationship burnout, then you may begin to feel:
- Detachment from your partner
- Cynical about the relationship
- Negative emotions about the relationship
- Emotional exhaustion
- Depleted of your energy
What Causes Relationship Burnout?
The exact reasons why relationship burnout occurs might be unknown but certain factors can contribute to your feelings of burnout in a relationship. For example, one reason that causes relationship burnout can include regular unresolved arguments. Of course, the exact cause of your relationship burnout can differ depending on your circumstances.
In any case, when one partner begins to feel that they are being taken advantage of or taken for granted, then an imbalance of power can occur in the relationship causing a disconnect between the couple.
Some common factors that cause relationship burnout include:
- Feeling undervalued or not being valued at all by the partner
- Having a Type-A Personality
- Being chronically stressed
- Feeling stuck in a relationship rut
- Feeling detached from the partner
- Lack of communication in the relationship
- Feeling a loss of autonomy
- Feeling the burden of other responsibilities
- Not having a compatible partner/personalities
- Experiencing external stress (finances, workplace, etc)
Relationship Burnout Signs To Watch Out For
Here are some common relationship burnout signs that you need to watch out for:
1. Feeling No Motivation
When you’re feeling emotionally exhausted in the relationship, then spending time with your partner (even a dinner date) can feel like a chore. If you have no motivation to spend time with your partner or if you don’t feel like putting an effort into the relationship anymore, then it could be one of the signs of relationship burnout.
2. Feeling Hopeless
Another relationship burnout sign that should not be ignored is when you feel hopeless about the relationship. You feel like your relationship isn’t moving forward or going anywhere and instead of being optimistic and hopeful, you feel depressed when you think about your relationship.
3. Feeling Disconnected
If there’s an emotional and physical disconnect in the relationship, then it’s another sign of relationship burnout. You feel like the intimacy you share with your partner is dwindling and there’s nothing you say or feel is being accepted. This is a sign that you are struggling with relationship burnout.
4. Having Doubts
When doubts about the relationship or your partner creep in, when you begin to second guess everything in the relationship, then it can also be another relationship burnout sign that can’t be ignored. You constantly feel like asking yourself, “Is this the right person/partner in my life?”
5. Lack Of Patience
If you find yourself lacking patience or getting irritated frequently, then it can be a sign of relationship burnout too. The quirks you used to admire in your partner are now becoming a nuisance that you can’t find yourself accepting. This mood shift can also cause more disagreements in the relationship, which can also be a sign of burnout in your relationship.
6. Thoughts Of Ending The Relationship
Another big sign that you are feeling burnout in the relationship can be when you begin to actively think about ending your relationship. Anytime your partner speaks about the future of the relationship, you feel hopeless and get frustrated. Sometimes, this kind of thinking may either lead to or can be born out of infidelity.
7. Having Regular Arguments
If you’re feeling burnout in your relationship, then another sign you need to look out for is having regular arguments with your partner. You’ll notice that your disagreements remain unsolved and any conflicts that arose stay for longer than they used to. Arguments are normal in a relationship but when these arguments become regular with no way to resolve them, then it could be a problem.
How To Overcome Burnout In Relationships?
If you’re experiencing the above-mentioned signs of relationship burnout, then here are some tips that can help you cure relationship burnout:
1. Communicate With Your Partner
One way you can begin healing relationship fatigue can be through communication. Try to express your emotional needs as well as physical needs to your partner. Be honest about what you’re feeling, state your boundaries, and list out your expectations with your partner. Having an open channel of communication between you and your partner can help overcome burnout in relationships.
2. Spend Time With Your Partner
If you’re experiencing the signs of relationship burnout, then another thing that can help you overcome it can be spending quality time with your partner. It can become easier to feel detached when you and your partner don’t prioritize your relationship. Try to make more commitments with your partner, go on regular date nights, or even spend some relaxing time with them after dinner.
3. Pay Attention To Their Love Language
Everyone has a love language and it’s time you pay attention to your partner’s. Try to observe their love language and carry out your actions keeping that in mind. For example, if your partner’s love language is “Quality Time”, then try to take some time out of your schedule to plan some activities with your partner.
4. Take A Break
If you’re in a relationship, it doesn’t mean that you need to spend all of your time together. Taking breaks can help you rekindle your relationship. Try to spend some time with your friends and family or even alone. Autonomy can help with your self-identity and can even help in some much-needed self-reflection. Plus, you can also restore your emotional energy when you take time for yourself!
5. Practice Gratitude
When you’re experiencing relationship burnout, focusing on your partner’s bad habits can become easier. Instead of focusing on those negative feelings, try to express gratitude towards your relationship and your partner. Try to look for things you’re grateful for in your partner and focus on the little things your partner does for you.
6. Seek Couples Counseling
When the emotional exhaustion and relationship fatigue becomes too much to handle on your own, it’s recommended that you seek couples counseling. Attending relationship therapy can help put things in perspective and help come up with different coping techniques as well as exercises to try with your partner.
Feeling a little frustrated with your partner in your relationship is OK, even common but when these feelings cause you to experience emotional exhaustion and fatigue, then it can be relationship burnout that should not be ignored.
Just because you’re experiencing relationship burnout does not mean that you no longer love or care for your partner and want to end the relationship. With some steps and with a side of professional help, you can rekindle your relationship and overcome burnout in relationships just like any other kind of burnout.
Don’t forget to look at the big picture or fail at expressing your emotions and needs to your partner. Little things can change the course of your relationship.
I hope this article helped you understand what relationship burnout is, its signs, and how you can overcome burnout in relationships.
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