How Much Space Is TOO Much Space? Let’s Find The Right Balance

Last Update on July 15, 2023 : Published on April 1, 2022

What’s the key to a perfect relationship or a marriage?


Doing each and everything together?

Doing things that they like?

Sticking with each other 24*7?


Being available always?

Well, if you think that relationship or marriage is all about the above-listed things…my dear friend, you might be standing in the wrong direction!

The relationship is not at all about sticking to each other 24*7. Modern relationships do not work that way! The fact is that a relationship is all about love, intimacy, and trust. However, if you’re dating someone of this era then a relationship is all about love, intimacy, trust, and space.

Seeking some space should be normalized as relationships should not be weighed on the basis of space. I completely understand the situation when your partner or you ask to have some space, the situation becomes a little panicky. But, the Brightside of seeking space is that it is a positive force. Every couple has the right to have some space, don’t worry it will not break your relationship; instead, it will strengthen your relationship.

However, the catch here is that you must know how to give some space in a relationship and what’s the right balance of the space required in your relationship.

In this blog, let’s find out the right balance of healthy space in a relationship. So, let’s get started.

What does Exactly Space Mean?

exactly space mean

Giving some space to your partner simply means taking some time to prioritize your personal needs and doing things for yourself. Personal space should be spent making or doing choices that make you feel better and provides you with a positive mindset without hampering your relationship or your partner’s feelings.

Is Space Normal for a Relationship?

Yes, without any second thought, space is good for your relationship. It will not only help in strengthening your relationship but it will also help in blossoming your romantic relationship. Being together always might look romantic however, sometimes, it also feels claustrophobic at times. Extreme claustrophobia, closeness, clinginess, or togetherness might result in a failed relationship.

By providing some space to your partner, you’ll be able to provide them time for fulfilling their personal needs. Hence, yes, seeking some space in a relationship is completely normal and should be encouraged mutually by both.

What’s the Importance of Space in a Relationship?

Why would someone need space when they have or got everything that they ever wanted from a relationship? I have seen a lot of couples feeling strange about it. Always remember, seeking some personal space helps in fulfilling personal needs. Therefore, space should be provided without any curiosity. It will help them in unwinding, fulfilling their personal needs, maintain a positive mindset, and de-stressing their issues.

It might happen that they had a bad day at work, with friends, or with family members? If they are asking for some break or space, they should get it without understanding the root of the issues. You can have a conversation with them later as well, first provide them some space, and let them unwind on their own (if they are asking for it).

15 Common Signs of Required Personal Space in Relationship

Below are some common signs that show that you definitely need some space in your relationship: 

1. Arguments are increased

If arguments are increasing day by day, this sign definitely shows that you both need some personal space in your relationship to take some time and think about your relationship, love, and future. Arguments are a major issue that needs to be resolved, if they are not getting resolved by staying with each other, you both must take some personal time or space to think about them. 

2. You need your partner’s approval for almost everything

If your partner gets angry when you don’t take approval to do things or visit friends, you might need some space to overcome the “controlling nature” of your partner. If you will not take care of this nature on time, it may result in jealousy. 

3. Your partner’s habits are becoming annoying

If you are becoming annoyed by your partner’s habits, it’s time to unwind your negative thoughts and reframe your thoughts. In the beginning, you loved those flaws right? And now, they are becoming annoying? Take some time to unwind and think about your love again. 

4. Your partner’s company is becoming a little clingy

We all love clinginess…don’t we? But conditions applied**

We all love clinginess to a certain level, when it goes to an extreme level, we all get irritated. In order to maintain that passion and spark in your relationship, take some personal time to unwind and de-stress. 

5. You love to spend time with yourself as well

If you feel like you are not getting enough time for self-care, self-love, self-compassion, you must have a conversation with your partner and mutually decide to have some personal time for yourself as well. 

6. You have started feeling stressed due to your relationship

If you have started feeling drained or stressed in your relationship, it shows that your mental health needs some extra care. Hence, try to avoid conflicts with your partner and seek some personal space to take care of your mental health. 

7. Your individuality is lost somewhere

No matter how much you love your partner or how much they love you, we must not lose our individuality or our own identity. Start providing time and personal space to yourself for achieving personal growth and goals

8. Connectivity with your partner is vanishing

When conversations start becoming boring with your partner, you both must seek some personal space to ignite the passion and love again. In order to take your relationship or marriage to a successful level, you need connectivity and connectivity can be attained by some personal space. 

If you feel like your connectivity is getting lost with your partner or need to re-connect with your partner again, you can also take the support of couple therapy.

Connect with Your Therapist Now

9. You don’t feel physically attracted to your partner

Physical attraction and intimacy are really important in a relationship or marriage. Romance with your partner should come from inside. And if you are not feeling attracted to your partner, it shows that you need some personal space to miss them and to ignite the passion again.

10. You miss your old-single life

Missing your single life and wishing to go back to the old life again? Well, it’s a strong sign that shows you are not happy with your current situation and you need some time to figure out. Seek some personal space but mutually discuss also. 

11. Your partner does not want to be interfered

If your partner does not want to be interfered after work or during meeting with his/her friends, it shows that they are having their own personal space and you must also seek it. 

12. Your partner’s replies are becoming syllabic

If you have recently observed that your partner’s replies are short or syllabic, it is a strong sign that shows you both need some personal space in your relationship. you must seek some time or space to figure out again. 

13. You don’t feel like sharing problems with your partner

You had a bad day at your office or argued with your friend, but don’t feel like sharing with your partner because you’re aware that they won’t understand and will react awkwardly to the situation. In order to avoid such a situation, seek some personal space and unwind on your own. 

14. You and your partner are stressed

If you both are stressed due to your professional life, office work, or some other stuff, you must avoid playing the blame game and should seek personal space so that you can help yourself and show love towards yourself. 

15. Your partner does not get involved with your hobbies

If your partner does not like to get involved with your hobbies, it does not mean that you must stop doing them because your partner does not like them. It shows that you must take some personal space or time to do it for yourself and enjoy the time by yourself.

How Much Space is Too Much Space?

A lot of people asked, “How much space is too much space?” Honestly speaking, the right amount of space should be chosen by you or your partner, because you know your partner and relationship better.

Your partner needs space according to their own needs, emotions, and feelings. Hence, it is always better to decide mutually how much space they want to unwind or fulfill their needs. Seeking some space might leave you in some shock, misunderstanding, or anger hence, before, lashing out at your partner, think that:

  • Arguments should be avoided as they will result in more stressful situations.
  • Wait till your partner is ready to talk about it. Don’t rush on to things.
  • Communicate your feelings in silence. You can let them know that you are always here whenever they need you.
  • Mutually respect the decision taken by your partner. Don’t force them to do things that they don’t want.
  • Small and sweet texts always work. Don’t fill their voice box with so many messages. Wait for their reply and always text over calling them again and again.
  • Sweet and small gestures should be prioritized during space.

Now, you have understood how to provide space without judging, let’s see how to provide the right amount of healthy space in your relationship.

Finding the Right Balance of Healthy Space in a Relationship

It might become difficult in the beginning, but after some time, it will definitely prove healthy or positive because space helps you in strengthening your relationship. Here are some tips to provide a healthy space for your partner with the right balance:

  • Don’t call your partner again and again when they are at work; instead, leave a small and sweet text.
  • If they need personal space, do not work together at home, go to a different room and find some other work to do.
  • Let your partner go out with their friends for some time. Do not judge.
  • Plan a day or two in a month for some personal space mutually so that you can both enjoy a healthy space in your relationship.

That’s it, folks! I hope this blog helps you to find the right balance of personal and healthy space in a relationship.

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Thanks for reading!

About The Author

Aayushi Kapoor
Aayushi Kapoor

Aayushi is a Content Creator at Calm Sage. She holds a Bachelor’s degree in Food Technology and a Master's Degree in Clinical Nutrition. Her constant interest in the improvement of mental health, nutrition, and overall wellness embarked upon her career as a “full-time educational writer.” She likes to make an asynchronous connection with her readers. Her mantra for living life is "What you seek is seeking you".

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