Everything You Need To Know About Ghosting
Definition of Ghosting
Ghosting is related to a dating term which means cutting off contact with someone without giving any explanation or warning. It has been observed that re-initiating the relationship again with the same person brings out the silence after being ghosted by someone.
Ghosting term means “easily vanishing someone from life” without giving an explanation or warning as if they were “ghost”.
Ghosting is generally used in a romantic relationship like he ghosted me or she ghosted me. However, in technical terms, it means to contact unexpectedly.
This blog covers:
- Definition of Ghosting
- History and popularity of the word “Ghosting”
- Why do people ghost
- Ghosting in a relationship
- How to cope after being ghosted by someone
- Is ghosting someone ok?
History and Popularity of the Word “Ghosting”
“Ghosting” became popular with the surge of online dating. Online dating came seven years ago although the term was used far back from the 1990s. Pop culture writers used this term for describing ghostwriting for hip-hop music.
As per Dating Coach Bree Jenkins, “Ghosting used to be leaving a person and moving away or not leaving (them with) your contact information—its earlier origins are even the simple act of leaving a party or social gathering without notice and goodbyes.”
With the surge in online dating and ghosting instances, the term “ghosting” became popular and widely adopted.
Why Do People Ghost
As per research, there are two main reasons behind ghosting someone.
1. People Choose to Take an Easy Way.
People find ghosting way easier than owing an explanation to someone. Additionally, people find ghosting comfortable than having weird and awkward conversations about having a life together. The person who has the trait of ghosting is keen towards avoiding confrontation and hurting others feelings.
Therefore, they simply ghost and cease all communication in the hope that the hint is already delivered.
2. Fatigue and option overload.
Margaret Seide, a famous psychiatrist mentioned that, “with internet dating comes what may seem like infinite choices as opposed to walking into a bar and having limited options. Because there are so many choices, online daters are quick to have the ‘Ok, next’ mindset.” “Sometimes the person is nice enough, but is juggling a few other people and that person just didn’t make the cut.”
Additionally, reports show that ghosting can also happen after a serious relationship.
Ghosting in a Relationship
Being ghosted by someone has various psychological impacts. Maybe you can imagine the feelings of being ghosted by your personal experience.
Bree Jenkins stated, “it’s almost like sudden loss [or] grief, especially the first time you’ve ever been ghosted. You are shocked, and you’re in denial, thinking things such as ‘maybe they didn’t see my text.’ Then you feel anger.”
Additionally, the feelings of depression can also come along with low self-esteem when ghosted by someone. Most common signs are feeling depressed, obsessed, stressed, and anxious when ghosted by someone. Feeling of sudden loss and grief does not come with a timeline. A person can feel sad about being ghosted according to personality traits.
How to Cope After Being Ghosted by Someone
Being ghosted comes with a flood of emotions. Being ghosted can make someone feel devalued and dehumanized. Moreover, it feels worse when someone ghosts after having a serious relationship. The road of grief is a long-way run and it takes time to overcome the pain. However, acceptance is the only key to move on after being ghosted by someone.
Sometimes, it may also feel like getting closure to move on.
However, in this regard, Meidi stated that you can send over a voice message like,
“Hey, I haven’t heard from you for a while. I am not sure what happened but I don’t want to continue pursuing this. My time is valuable and I don’t want to leave this door open. Best of luck with things.”
Chances are ghoster will not reply to such messages, however, it will help you to get closure to move on.
Is ghosting Someone Ok?
No, not at all, ghosting is considered a rude route to get freedom from someone especially ghosting in serious relationships is not okay. Everyone needs closure. Therefore, if you’re planning to ghost on someone, please reconsider and owe them a small explanation.
Even if you don’t want to explain, just drop in a small text stating,
“It can sound something like ‘Hey, you seem like a great catch, but I don’t feel it’s working between us. I respect your time and just wanted to be honest. Warm regards and take care.”
If you’re not able to cope with a breakup or a heartbreak, get help from a professional mental health expert.
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