15 Ways To Give Someone Space Without Losing Them + Why You Should Give Space
“I need space” It is quite common to hear this phrase from your partner, sibling, or friend but have you ever wondered why and how to give someone space without losing them? I ask this because a few years ago, I asked a friend to give me some space and they failed to understand what or how to give space.
The aftermath? Well, I lost one good friend. That incident has always prompted me to think about the need to give someone space (without losing them for good). And today, that’s what I’m going to talk about.
When your loved one – your partner, sibling, or friend – tells you that they need some space, it’s okay and even normal to feel anxious. I mean no one wants to lose their loved one and isn’t asking for space a sign that you’re about to lose a loved one’s trust and support?
Truthfully, no. Yes, you might begin to wonder what you did wrong that prompted them to pull away from you, and yes, you may begin to think of the worst-case scenario but have you thought about ways to give someone space without losing them?
Every healthy relationship has conflicts and sometimes those conflicts and disagreements can raise feelings that can become too overwhelming, too soon. To navigate those troubling emotions, and to avoid resentment from building in a relationship, space is needed. Asking for space and giving someone space in a relationship is a sign of healthy boundaries so don’t worry too much!
Below, I’ve listed some easy 15 ways to give someone space in a relationship without losing them. Let’s take a look at them!
How To Give Someone Space Without Losing Them?
If you’re struggling to understand how to learn to give someone space in a relationship without losing them for good, here are some ways to help you out:
1. Ask How Much Time They Need
The first thing you need to know when your loved one asks for some space is how long to give someone space. How much time do they need? If you have a specific time in your mind, it’ll be easy to cope with the distance. Just knowing that they need space for a specific time can make you feel comfortable giving them space.
2. Know What “Giving Space” Means For Them
Another way to give someone space without losing them is to understand what they mean by “giving space”. Do they want to take a break from the relationship? Do they want to relocate to another room? Or do they want to limit the conversation? Understand what they mean so you know what to do to help them.
3. Don’t Force Them To Defend Their Reasons
When someone asks for space, it’s OK to feel hurt, and when we’re hurt we often look for ways to fix that. In this case, avoid forcing them to explain their reasons for wanting space. When you force them to defend their reasons, it might make them feel agitated and uncomfortable. If they tell you, it’s good, if they don’t, avoid forcing them to talk.
4. Thank Them For Being Upfront
When someone asks for space, it’s a big step so instead of being defensive, be grateful, and thank your loved one for being upfront with you. Appreciate their honesty and encourage them to do whatever they need to do.
5. Let Them Spend Some Time Away From You
Another way to give someone space without losing them is to let your loved one spend some time away from you and the commitments you’ve made together. Remind them to go out with their friends and enjoy some time with people other than you.
6. Give Them Ideas For Activities They Might Enjoy
If they are asking for space then maybe let them. If they can’t seem to think about what to do next, you can help them by suggesting ideas for activities they can do without you. Giving them space does not always mean walking away, it means making sure your loved one is OK and is doing things to make them feel better.
7. Respect Their Wishes
When your loved one is asking for space, respect their wishes. Tell them that needing space is a good thing and you respect that. You need to make them feel assured that they are being heard and their respects are being cared for.
8. Encourage Them To Follow Their Interests
Take some time to think about your loved one’s favorite activities or interests. They might’ve stopped doing things they love because you don’t enjoy them. So encourage them to follow their interests and if they ask you to do something, maybe give it a try with them once again.
9. Limit Your Contact With Them
Until they say otherwise! Constant texts and calls can also make someone uncomfortable and if your loved one has asked for some space then this means limiting your contact with them as well. Before you pick up your phone to text them or call them, think twice about how often you’ve stayed in contact with them this week or day. If you’ve had regular contact, then maybe it’s time to slow down.
10. Enjoy Some Time On Your Own
In relationships, there comes a time when you and your partner do many things together and neglect your interests. Think about the last time you enjoyed something on your own. If you can’t remember a time, then take some time to spend it with yourself. Do your own thing while encouraging your loved one to do theirs.
11. Spend Some Time With Others
Your partner might be a great source of affection and companionship but so are others, namely your friends and family. If you’re wanting space or are giving someone space, then take this time to spend time with others. You might not feel very lonely then.
12. Engage In Something Different
When you’re giving someone space then doing things you’re used to doing with them can be difficult. To make sure you don’t feel lonely or too anxious without your partner, engage in something different. Go volunteer, take an online course, or join an online class/club.
13. Make Sure You’re Available To Your Loved One
Another thing to keep in mind when you’re giving someone space is to make sure you’re available for your partner when they need your help. If your partner has asked you to give them space, then let them know that while you’re respecting their choice, you’re still available to them if they need you.
14. Take Care Of Your Needs
In a close relationship, it’s normal to get used to one another and stop taking care of yourself. When this is the case, then taking some space can be a chance to heal. Make sure you meet your needs, practice self-care, and just take care of yourself.
15. Talk To Them
Before you give someone space in a relationship, it’s good to have a talk with them and spend some time with them before giving them the space they need. Talk to each other, enjoy an activity together, or just be there for one another before you give them space. This will leave you with happy memories to reminisce on when your loved one is away healing.
Why Should You Give Someone Space?
When someone asks for space in a relationship, keep in mind that, giving someone space can turn your relationship stronger than ever. Spending time apart from one another can ensure that both people grow individually and then together as well.
Asking for space or giving someone space does not mean that a relationship is over. The fear and anxiety that creeps in when your loved one says, “I need space” is too real and normal but it doesn’t mean that they want a breakup. Giving someone space means allowing them (and yourself) some opportunity to pursue individual passion and goals while developing individually.
This is another great opportunity to allow yourself to feel the emotions and work out your thoughts when you couldn’t with a partner.
Yes, giving someone space is not only healthy for the one asking for space but also the one giving space.
It’s not easy to learn how to give someone space without losing them, especially in a close relationship. Feeling worried, anxious, and nervous is OK but remember, that while unpleasant emotions may arise, you have some time to yourself to work on your emotions and feelings.
When you don’t give someone space in a relationship, then you might create a distressing environment for your loved one (and yourself). This shows that you’re dependent on others for your emotional needs when you shouldn’t. This clinginess is also a sign of attachment issues.
If you find it challenging to give your loved one space, then you might be struggling with an underlying mental health condition such as attachment issues. Other mental health conditions that can cause you to cling to others and avoid giving someone space can be anxiety, stress, and depression.
If you have signs of these mental health conditions, then you can reach out to a professional for help. You can learn to cope with your feelings with the help of a licensed professional.
I hope this article helped you learn how to give someone space without losing them and why is it important to give someone space in a relationship.
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