15+ Things You Need To STOP apologizing For Now | Reconsider Your SORRY

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Things You Need To STOP apologizing For Now

We have always been told what all things we should be apologizing for by our parents, teachers, colleagues, friends, and loved ones. But how often are we told about the things that we should stop apologizing for? Don’t get me wrong here!

I am not asking you to be unapologetic for everything in your life. What I am trying to convey is that we often end up saying “Sorry” for things that we should be proud of. Trust me it is neither your mistake every single time nor your responsibility to apologize to others for things you are doing right. So it is better if we stop apologizing for these things.

Apologizing for things that you are not at fault for do more harm than good to you and your relationship with the other person. Before learning about things you should not be apologizing for let us see how deeply it impacts us:

  • Apologizing without any fault lowers down your self-esteem.
  • Frequent apologizing is more like self-criticism.
  • By apologizing to others for every single action of yours, you give them the power to belittle you and walk over you.
  • We reinforce our self-blaming neural circuits every time we apologize despite not being wrong.
  • The more often you apologize the less seriously you are taken by others.

To put it in a nutshell, you should stop apologizing for doing the right things (for your own good).

15 Things You Need to Stop Apologizing For

1. You Should Not Apologise For ENDING AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

If you have decided to move out of a relationship that does not fuel you and rather drains you, you should be patting on your back. After all, it takes courage and consciousness to identify and move out of a toxic and unhealthy relationship. Then why weigh yourself down in guilt when you should be holding your chin high for inspiring those around you. So breath in and twirl on Elsa’s Let it go!

2. You Should Not Apologise For THINGS YOU CAN’T CONTROL

Are you apologizing to others for the pandemic or its impact on their financial stability? Well before you do that ask yourself is it a factor that you can control in your life? Certainly not!

Then stop apologizing for it, my friend! Similarly, next time when you are about to apologize for something ask yourself was it under my control or not. If it was, say sorry with your heart, and if it was beyond your controllability be empathetic, not apologetic for it.

3. You Should Not Apologise For SAYING NO

We need to get this straight, saying NO is not rude! It is a way through which you set boundaries for yourself. Well of course you can use Sorry along with your NO to be kind. But if this sorry is coming from guilt, shame, or regret then it better not accompany your NO.

You are not obliged to be there for everyone, helping them out when you have too much to bite on your plate. And it is not only about having no time for others but even if you are not willing to do it or you are comfortable with the same, just say a NO.

Also, please do not back your NO with excuses or explanations (until not asked for). NO is an answer in itself. So, just like you joyously say YES, making people happy, learn to say NO as well with the same joy and without sorry!

Also Read: Positive Things to Learn to Get Through This Crisis Time

4. You Should Not Apologise For WANTING MORE (in your life)

I am glad how unapologetic Oneplus creators are for asking their customers to “Never Settle.” And honestly why to even settle when you have a lot on your hands to explore and learn. You should not be apologizing for having that hunger of wanting more that drives you to do more.

Well of course I am not asking you to become Thanos here (if you get the reference). What I am trying to communicate here is if you are studying more, working more, learning more, and just simply making space for more than those around you, be proud and not apologetic. Hey, but make sure that you are being a kind soul at the same time.

5. You Should Not Apologise For YOUR PAST

PAST! Don’t we all have one. Then why to say be apologetic for the one that you had. It was a phase that has passed teaching you life lessons that you wouldn’t have explored otherwise. So own it instead of allowing others to make you feel overwhelmed about the same.

Trust me or not we all make mistakes, learn from them, and continue moving forward in our lives. My dear friend forgive yourself for your past and start apologizing for having one.

6. You Should Not Apologise For YOUR IMPERFECTIONS

Do you know what is the biggest illusion that we all allow to haunt us? Well, it is Perfection. Nothing around you is perfect, the moon you are looking at, the gadget you are using and even the song you are listening to. Everything around us has a loophole or something to improve on.

So how can you be apologetic for your imperfections and for being who you are? If that imperfection would be a reason to apologize the entire universe would be echoing with the word SORRY! Then what to do about the imperfections you notice in yourself or the other’s pinpoint at you? Embrace them, accept them, if worthy enough work on them; just don’t be sorry for them.

Also Read: Know What You Really Want: Understanding Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

7. You Should Not Apologise For CLEARING YOUR DOUBTS

Do you apologize before asking a question or clearing your doubts? Stop! You are not a human encylpoedia you can’t be knowing everything and anything. Ask questions and clear your doubts with a wide smile in your face rather than a sorry on your lips and fear of being judged in your heart.

Asking questions allows you to grow and learn why would you even apologize for an opportunity like this? Maybe this Chinese proverb will help you here:

“He who asks a question remains a fool for five minutes. He who does not ask remains a fool forever.”

Now it is your call which side you wish to be on! I will suggest you to never stop asking questions and never stop learning.

P.S.: You really need not to be sorry for not knowing the answers either! You see it goes both ways.

8. You Should Not Apologise For YOUR FEELINGS

“I am sorry but I am not feeling good today.” Are you guilty of using this phrase quite often? Oh, there is nothing wrong with “not feeling good” but being apologetic for the same BEEP BEEP (error detected). Your feelings make you who you are, they guide your actions and thoughts.

By accepting and expressing your feelings you help others to understand you. Plus, you help yourself by not piling your feelings within you. So allow yourself to feel and accept your feelings with zero apologies attached. Here instead of saying sorry use phrases like I feel upset… or I feel uncomfortable with…

You see there are more options to express than being sorry about having them in the first place! Practice them fella.

Also Read: How to Balance Mind, Body, and Soul During a Crisis

9. You Should Not Apologise For LOVING YOURSELF

You know everyone turns their back towards you, you will still have someone who will always back you. Any guesses? Go stand in front of the mirror and you will find your answer. Yes it is YOU! Then why be ashamed or apologetic of loving the permanent support system of your life.

Love yourself, accept yourself, and support yourself without the feeling of being sorry weighs you down. If you want to dance, then dance, if you want “me-time” enjoy it, if you want to do nothing for the day just don’t. None of these actions require an apology.

Self-love an overrated concept for many, a basic mental health care tip for me! Share your views on self-love in the comments section below. Let us have a chat!!!

10. You Should Not Apologise For STANDING OUT OF THE CROWD

Ever wondered why Steve Rogers, the thin guy with zero built, was chosen to be Captain America? You guessed it right- he standed out of the crowd! He was unique in his own way but was he apologetic for the same? Certainly not!

So take some inspiration from him and stop apologizing for being who you are. Embrace your unique self and respect it, it is only then when others will respect it. Also, trust me these days the ones who stand out of the crowd are the ones who shine bright instead of those who are following the herd.

11. You Should Not Apologise For LOVING AND RESPECTING SOMEONE

Loving someone is the purest form of emotion that you can have for someone, then why be apologetic for the same? It is okay if things did not end well or you did not love yourself back, never regret or say “I am sorry I loved you.”

Instead, celebrate the fact that you have been able to love someone and you know how it feels when you shower love on someone.

Also Read: Things You Should Never Say To Someone With Depression

12. You Should Not Apologise For CHASING YOUR DREAMS

A dream is a force that drives us. Don’t dumb your dreams because your second cousin thinks it is never going to work! Instead, chase your dream and do not be apologetic for it. Trust me the happiness that follows after giving your shot towards your dream is unmet! So focus on that instead.

13. You Should Not Apologise For SOMEONE ELSE’S MISTAKES

Are you apologizing for your partner not showing up for family dinner or for your kid’s poor grades (read the second point again please). They are the doers of their actions and behavior, they hold the responsibility and apology (if required) for the same.

You should not apologize for others even as you can’t vouch for them or be in charge of their actions. However, if you still find yourself in such a situation where people expect you to apologize for your close associates you may use a gentler phrase like- Excuse me instead of saying sorry.

14. You Should Not Apologise For BEING HONEST

Honesty is the best policy. We all grew up listening to this phrase, didn’t we? And while we have always been taught, to be honest, we still find ourselves apologizing for speaking the truth. Not anymore! Make a note of it now that you are never going to apologize for being truthful in your life and abide by it. After all, it is the best policy then why Sorry over it?

15. You Should Not Apologise For CARING FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

Have you been apologizing for following the hashtag Mental health matters? DON’T! Do you say sorry for feeling sick or having a bad stomach or visiting a doctor for the same?

Then why apologize for taking care of your mental health and seeking help from a professional. How about patting on your back instead, for valuing both your mind and body in your life. Here is one from me… Kudos buddy!

Other Things You Not Need To Apologize For

    Wait.. wait! Did you think the list is ending here? Not yet! Keep reading…

    • Stop apologizing for giving your suggestions or sharing your ideas.
    • Stop apologizing for having “me” time.
    • Stop apologizing for things you didn’t even do.
    • Stop apologizing for being kind.
    • Stop apologizing for doing things from the right place.
    • Stop apologizing for sticking to your priorities.
    • Stop apologizing for being organized or on time.
    • Stop apologizing for having an opinion.
    • Stop apologizing for going with your gut feeling.
    • Stop apologizing for your failures.
    • Stop apologizing for responding immediately to a message or call.
    • Stop apologizing for asking for help.
    • Stop apologizing for giving your best at school, work, and other areas of your life.
    • Stop apologizing for not fitting in the gender stereotypes suggested by the society.

    Have more reasons to add to this list of “Things You Need To Stop apologizing For” share it with us in the comments section below. We would love to hear from you and add it to our content!

Now next time when these things happen in your life and your tongue twists to say SORRY, imagine me yelling in your head: STOP apologizing!!! And take responsibility and pride in what you are doing. But if your doings are hurting someone or are wrong be brave enough to apologize for the same.

P.S.: Do no wrong, hurt no heart

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