Unlocking The Secrets Of Highly Resilient People

Last Update on August 25, 2021 : Published on December 29, 2020
Unlocking The Secrets Of Highly Resilient People

“Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” – Nelson Mandela

This quote by Nelson Mandela is something we all can relate to. I, for one, do. There were times in my life where getting up again felt like a chore but no matter how hard life seemed to pull me down, I got through it and got back up again to reach where I am today.

Related: What is Resilience and Why Building Resilience is Important

Resilience is something that makes us get back up again after a hard fall. It is something that makes facing challenges and obstacles easy. A resilient person isn’t born, they’re made. Resilience isn’t a trait that many people are born with but it is something that many people learn from past experiences and failures.

Many people are successful even though they face difficulties, how? Their priority: staying resilient.

Richard Branson, one of the most successful entrepreneurs in the world, is dyslexic. His school headmaster told him that he would either end up in prison or become a millionaire. All of us face challenges – physical and mental – but how we overcome them is what makes us strong.

Also Read: 11 Celebrities with Depression Who Fought and Defeated it

But what are the habits that separate these highly resilient people from us? What are their secrets?

1 | Positive Thoughts Equals Positive Mind

One wrong thing can make your mood worse and ruin your day. But thinking positive (all the time, mind you) is one of the secrets that highly resilient people follow. Reframing your thoughts in a positive outlook can be a bit of a struggle in the beginning but with regular positive thinking, you can transform your life.

Negative thoughts aren’t easy to turn off but reframing those negative thoughts into a positive and optimistic way can help you become stronger in the face of your adversities.

Being optimistic all the time can make you more resilient. Appreciate the small things that are happening in your life – small or big. Be more mindful of those small things. Thinking positive matches a positive mind.

2 | Good Friendships Save The Day

When we are stressed or are recovering from a terrible day, we prefer to be alone with our thoughts. But staying alone in such circumstances can be bad for your resiliency. Instead of facing your failures alone, build a support system that comprises people whom you trust and radiate positivity.

Reaching out for help is something that resilient people do and advocate. Asking for help doesn’t make you weak or isn’t a setback. Reaching out to others can improve your ability to fight your failures and stress. Good and positive friendships have been proven to improve not only your mental health but emotional and physical health as well.

Sharing the stress of your struggles with your friends can help you bounce back from your frustrations fairly quickly.

3 | Self-Awareness Is Imperative

Self-awareness can make or ruin not just your mental health but also those around you. If something goes wrong with your day, you are more likely to reflect negative actions on those around you. Developing self-awareness can help you destroy the source of your negative thoughts before they affect your health.

Self-awareness also helps you recognize your coping skills – poor or otherwise – and fight against them to become more resilient.

4 | Face Your Challenges Head-On

There are some challenges and setbacks in your life that can’t be solved or avoided. The death of a family member, for instance, is inevitable. In such a case, people with high resilience face such challenges head-on. They use healthy ways to identify the source of their distress, develop coping methods, and seek solutions to reach a positive outcome.

Also Read: How To Turn Your Disappointments Into Your Strengths? Learn Now

Ignoring or avoiding facing such challenges can turn out to be unhealthy for you. Facing your fears head-on is something that all resilient people do. Facing your fears doesn’t only make your life more successful but also help you find more creative ways to resolve problems and deal with setbacks.

5 | Recharge

Being resilient doesn’t mean that you need to always have the ability to spring back from your problems. While being resilient is an important trait, it doesn’t mean that you need to stay that way all the time. Taking some time off to recharge can help you build a strong reserve of willpower to tap into when needed the most.

Related: 7 Types of Rest That You and Your Body Needs Right Now

Take some time to recharge your emotional health to make sure your energy and health are intact to help you recover quickly from your next challenge.


Resilience isn’t something you are born with. You, too, can become resilient by:

1. Not blaming yourself for your setbacks

2. Reaching out for help when you need it

3. Accepting help from others you love and trust when offered

4. Accepting your past mistakes and learning from them instead of letting them influence your present and future decisions

5. Making yourself your priority, always

6. Accepting and embracing change instead of forcing it

Once you’ve unlocked the secrets of highly resilient people, you can become as successful and happy as them! Permit yourself to make mistakes but don’t let those mistakes direct your life.

There is No Shame in Asking for Help!

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Failures are a part of our lives but having the strength and perseverance to bounce back from those failures is what makes us successful and strong.

You are not alone in your failures. You are enough as you are.

“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.” – Steve Maraboli

Never give up!

About The Author

Swarnakshi Sharma
Swarnakshi Sharma

Swarnakshi is a content writer at Calm sage, who believes in a healthier lifestyle for mind and body. A fighter and survivor of depression, she strives to reach and help spread awareness on ending the stigma surrounding mental health issues. A spiritual person at heart, she believes in destiny and the power of Self. She is an avid reader and writer and likes to spend her free time baking and learning about world cultures.


  1. Mathew

    Your tips are great but can you explain how to be more self-aware?

    1. Swarnakshi Sharma
      Swarnakshi Sharma

      Hello Mathew, thanks for visiting Calmsage. Of course! The best thing you can do to be more self-aware is to listen to your feelings and emotions. Creating a journal with my priorities written in it has always worked best for me. You can try similar activities along with meditation and getting feedback from the people you trust the most. I hope this helps! For more information, you can write to us at info@calmsage.com.

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