Do You Feel Worthless In Relationships? Learn About Imposter Syndrome In Relationships

Last Update on July 25, 2023 : Published on July 25, 2023
Do You Feel Worthless In Relationships

We often feel unworthy or worthless due to personal or professional issues, but do you know that such feelings can have a huge impact on your relationship too? You might have heard about imposter syndrome which involves self-doubt even when you’re competent and deserving! Imposter syndrome in relationships is quite the same thing and yes, imposter syndrome applies to relationships as well!

Imposter syndrome in the relationship begins when a partner starts feeling that they are not good enough or unworthy of love. Well, a little bit of insecurity is normal but imposter syndrome in the relationship can make someone doubt to an extreme level. In this blog, let us understand what imposter syndrome is in a relationship and how we can overcome it. So, let’s get started!

Imposter Syndrome in Relationships: 

Imposter Syndrome in relationships causes constant worries, self-doubt, anxiety, and insecurities that impact a relationship negatively and can even end the relationship.

Signs of Imposter Syndrome in Relationships

When you or your partner starts acting weird, you can tell that something’s wrong, but in order to observe imposter syndrome in a relationship, you can look forward to the below-listed signs:


Constant feelings of being insufficient and struggling to view yourself as worthy or deserving people can be commonly seen in imposter syndrome in relationships.  

2.Focused on negativities

When someone is too focused on negativities or shortcomings, they start neglecting their strengths and start counting their presence as a burden, instead of showing equal partnership in the relationship.

3.Undefined fears

An individual struggling with imposter syndrome in a relationship often experiences undefined fears that can feel like falling apart and inadequacy. People often find themselves constantly fearing rejection as their partner will eventually find out their true self.


Constant worries and feelings of inadequacy result in self-doubt. People might start feeling insecure or jealous of their weaknesses as they really find it hard to be in a relationship with someone who’s perfect from every edge.

5.Keeping up with the worst

Someone who’s struggling with imposter in the relationship always expects the worst and they always prepare themselves for the worst. An individual struggling with imposter syndrome in a relationship might think of the worst instead of focusing on the Brightside.

6.Constant urge to be perfect

Perfectionism runs around imposter syndrome in relationships. The tendency to be perfect all the time can have direct negative impacts on the relationship. The constant pressure to live in perfectionism can ignite depression or anxiety.

7.Untold insecurities

Yes, people with imposter syndrome do feel insecure about a lot of things. They always self-doubt, push away their insecurities under the carpet and never talk about their emotions effectively.


Insecurities, feelings of rejection, and other undefined fears can trigger shame. Constant feelings of unworthiness and “not being enough” can leave you hanging and self-doubting your abilities.


Due to a lack of self-esteem, people often get involved feeling worthless in a marriage or in a relationship. Even such feelings can trigger people with higher self-confidence professionally.

10.Constant reassurance

Due to insecurity and fear of rejection, people struggling with imposter syndrome in a relationship keep on seeking constant reassurance from their partners! The problem is that they don’t verbalize their feelings, instead react to them which can be a deal-breaker in many relationships.

Impacts of Imposter Syndrome on Relationships

There are many ways imposter syndrome in a relationship can impact the relationship you’re looking forward to:

1.Lack of communication

Imposter syndrome and self-doubt make communication harder! People find it really hard to express their feelings and honestly communicate in the relationship as they constantly battle through fears as well. As a result, both partners start suppressing their feelings so that they don’t end up getting offended.

2.Lack of deep connection

Due to a lack of trust, self-doubt, and unworthiness, an individual struggling with imposter syndrome is not able to bring the real self to the table and which makes it more difficult to form a deeper connection. In order to be in an exclusive relationship, it’s really important to share a bond or a connection, and imposter syndrome makes it hard to reach the goal.


Due to lack of connection and effective communication, a lot of strain builds up which most of the time results in a lot of validation or reassurance-seeking behavior. This can be really exhausting for both partners as they are not able to talk through the difficulties.


Jealousy, insecurity, inadequacy, and undefined fears can trigger conflicts and resentment in a relationship which can take a lot of toll on mental health as well. In order to solve conflicts, effective communication can be key!


When feelings of unworthiness and inadequacy run through the mind, you both might start pushing each other away and start sabotaging your relationship consequently. If you constantly think that you’re unworthy of love, it might result in a lot of mental health issues such as stress, anxiety, mood swings, and more.

6.Lack of right efforts

Feelings of rejection or other fears make it harder to talk it out, but it also makes it difficult to put in the right efforts to stop the conflicts from building in. Lack of effort in imposter syndrome can sound like, “Eventually my partner will see through and end things with me probably!”

Causes of Imposter Syndrome in Relationships

According to psychologists, the below-listed causes can result in imposter syndrome in a relationship:

  • Insecurities

People who are insecure and self-doubt their worth may start feeling undeserving of love from the beginning. This can be a concerning cause because it often results in a lack of trust or inability to express feelings in front of loved ones.

  • Perfectionism

People with perfectionism tendencies are more prone to develop imposter syndrome in a relationship as they are never willing to live up to unrealistic expectations and this leaves no room for flaws or destructive behaviors from them or even their partners.

  • Self-sabotage

Self-sabotaging behaviors can be very common in people with imposter syndrome. In order to be in control, sometimes, people end up ruining it. As a result, most such behaviors result in repeated breakups or a pattern of unhealthy relationships.

Ways to Overcome Imposter Syndrome in Relationships

Imposter syndrome in a relationship can be a little bit challenging to overcome, however, with practice and constant focus, you can try some effective strategies to build a healthy relationship:

1.Identify your triggers

The first step towards overcoming imposter syndrome in a relationship is to learn about your triggers. You can begin the process by being self-aware of your thoughts, feelings, or situations.

2.Work on destructive thoughts

In order to work on destructive thoughts, you will really need to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. Remember, your partner chose you over everyone else, there might be something good in you, therefore, remind yourself of your qualities and leave no space for destructive thoughts.

3.Practice self-compassion

Self-compassion can help you awaken your mental, emotional, and intellectual well-being. Additionally, it can also be a great tool for overcoming imposter syndrome. Try your best, include positive elements, and focus on the positive side.

4.Communicate effectively

One of the great ways to overcome imposter syndrome in a relationship is to have an open and honest conversation with your partner. You can talk about your insecurities, inadequacy, and more in a more effective manner.

5.Focus on your strengths

Remind yourself that you’re worthy of all, and focus more on your strengths so that you can increase self-worth, self-worth, and self-confidence. Herein, you can also take the help of positive affirmations.

6.Seeking therapy

Consider couples therapy or individual therapy to work on destructive behaviors. Additionally, therapy can help you explore causes and teach healthy patterns instead.

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Key Takeaway: Helping a Partner Overcome Imposter Syndrome in Relationships

If your loved one is struggling through the symptoms of imposter syndrome, you can help or support them:

  • Giving them compliments and appreciating them
  • Avoiding comparisons and focusing on your relationship
  • Setting healthy boundaries for both
  • Helping them open up towards open and honest communication

I hope this blog helps you understand imposter syndrome in relationships, how it affects a relationship, and how to overcome it.

Comment down and share your views on the same.

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About The Author

Aayushi Kapoor
Aayushi Kapoor

Aayushi is a Content Creator at Calm Sage. She holds a Bachelor’s degree in Food Technology and a Master's Degree in Clinical Nutrition. Her constant interest in the improvement of mental health, nutrition, and overall wellness embarked upon her career as a “full-time educational writer.” She likes to make an asynchronous connection with her readers. Her mantra for living life is "What you seek is seeking you".

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